Wednesday, October 16, 2013

Ni de aquí, Ni de allá

So I have written and rewritten this blog over and over because I haven’t been too happy about how I have expressed my self. I guess though that with the recent events in the soccer world it becomes easier for me to describe it from this perspective.

I cheer for the USA and Mexico when it comes to national team soccer. My favorite soccer teams are Club America and the L.A. Galaxy.  Yet, when the USMNT plays Mexico, I will cheer for the US over Mexico!

I have been called many things because of this. Things like sell-out, traitor, “pocho”, and coconut, just to name a few. People get angry and frustrated when they see me walking around in my US soccer jersey and I guess it’s understandable. 

I born and raised in L.A. Grew up on Cantinflas, La India Maria, and el Chapulín Colorado as my entertainment. Rancheras, corridos and Luis Miguel were blasted from our radios. My favorite food is “Chiles Rellenos” and I love “pan dulce” with a passion (my father use to say my real dad was a baker).

My dad is from Tlalchapa, Guerrero and my mom is from La Constancia, Durango. I spent my summer vacations in my mom’s childhood home; Spanish was my first language but even then, like the India Maria once said “ni de aquí, ni de allá,” which means “neither from here or there.” My cousins never considered me Mexican and in school I was not American. Even so, you can tell I am as Mexican as they come.

The US has truly been a land of opportunity for parents and I. We obtained free education, health services, and a pretty decent standard of living. English eventually my first language, I like country music (don’t judge!), funnel cakes, hotdogs and the Beach Boys; hey, I am a Cali dude after all.

Yet, in a society where you MUST choose a side I have chosen to root for the US.

I have my reasons. For many, they seem illogical but they’re my reasons nevertheless. I am proud of my Mexican heritage, don’t get me wrong. The US though is the country where I was born, raised, and might die in.

In history, Mexicans born in the US have had to fight for they identity. They were considered outcasts by both their country birth and their country of heritage. In order to fill that void, the Chicano movement was born. They fought for the rights of Mexican-American in the US. One of the greatest leaders in the Chicano movement was Cesar Chavez.

It reminds me a lot of my place here in this earth. The bible says that we are not of this world. More specifically it says, “If you were of the world, the world would love you as its own; but because you are not of the world, but I chose you out of the world, therefore the world hates you.” (John 15:19)

So many times we walk around in this world trying to fit in. We fight the battle of being both spiritual and social beings. The amazing thing about this is that our identity is not defined by the world. The bible time and time again identifies those who believe in Jesus and trust in him as friends (John 15:15), his workmanship (Ephesians 2:10), fellow citizens… and members of the household of God (Ephesians 2:19), children of God (John 1:12), and many more. While the world may reject us, God accepts us.

So I guess in the end it doesn’t matter whether I cheer for the US or Mexico. My identity far more than Mexican-American or Chicano is, above all things, a Son of God. We are all free to be proud of our heritage. I invite you to celebrate that heritage! It is beautiful to be part of such a diverse country where cultures can mix and we can have such things as Korean tacos, interracial marriages, Spanglish, Tex-Mex music and pizza with a side of Jarritos to wash it down. Remember, “You were bought with a price; do not become bondservants of men.” (1 Corinthians 7:23)

I am a son of two countries, but above all I am a son of the Almighty God, through Jesus, who gave His life for me.



"What else could we do? We don't want any other King. We're your people."
The Mice, from The Last Battle

-C.S. Lewis

Monday, October 14, 2013

The Why Of... part 1


...To be like Jesus

I guess it’s a choice that still continues to follow me today. I didn’t have to make it. I could have allowed for things to just go on as usual and maybe I wouldn’t be where I am at today. Yet, when I said those words, in a way I make an “unintentional” commitment for my life to take a different path.

She was sitting alone in a bench right outside of the administration building. It was late, people were slowly making themselves back into the dorms but she just sat there staring starry eyed into the dark, void night. As I picked up the pace to walk by her, something had me turn back.


I sat next to her and she gave me a weird look.

“How are you doing?” I asked.

“What do you care?” she responded in a clearly annoyed toned.

There was silence. I wanted to leave so bad but I just couldn’t something held me glued to my seat. And in that moment of silence she put her had between her hands and began to cry.

In the midst of tears she spoke of heartbreak, loss, doubts, evil thoughts, anger, regret, frustrations and the end of it all. She spoke with rage of those who hurt her and was serious about the direction of her life and how to end it.

And as she ended she turned with tears in her eyes and asked, “Why do you care? Why did you turn and sit next to me when everyone else walked right on by?”

I wasn’t expecting that question. I was hoping to answer a much easier one or maybe take up a request for prayer. I guess that when someone is broken they want to know why others even care.

“I want to be like Jesus,” I responded hesitantly and with a bit of doubt.

Her eyes swelled up, tears fell down her cheeks and a peaceful laughter came from her now smiling face. “Well, you’re on the right path,” she said.

She stood up, thanked me and walked away.

We didn’t pray or hug or read the bible but in an unexplainable way God made himself present. It was that day that I can honestly say that I knew that I wanted to do something in which I could show the love of Jesus to every one I met. I didn’t plan to be a pastor; I had put that desire behind me and was now looking forward to a career as a teacher.

Today, I find myself in the seminary, a place that I now that I had intentionally avoided for many years. I’m far from being like Jesus. Every day it is a struggle to be connected to him and reflect his love. My go to verse has been Galatians 2:20 “I have been crucified with Christ; and it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself up for me.”

In the end, for me it is about that commitment I made in Puerto Rico. A daily surrender of who I am to be more like Jesus.

I want to be like Jesus. Hold me accountable to it but forgive me if I fail to do so because as you may know, it is a daily fight against our natures.